It’s so funny how life plays out. Letting go of control is a thought that I catch, and remind myself to release. This process Joe and I are going through is a testament to a strong foundation. As the surgery approaches our sensitivity increases as we are both passionate and strong.
Joe and I are laughing, (not so funny earlier) about how we need to be more attentive to each others intuition. I understand it is the knowledge needed in making choices. The gut feeling is there, what do you do with it? The awareness comes in, and we wait with it, until we can know what it means and how it will affect the choices presented. What I “think” about the feeling is crucial to the outcome.
Back in June we met with Joe’s surgeon about the treatment plan. After the meeting we left the office and my husband turned to me and said, you didn’t like him, did you? I thought for a moment and replied, “it doesn’t matter if I like him, do you like him and do you trust him?” My feeling about the situation remained and I struggled with the idea of judgment, all the while in my heart I felt is was guidance. I wanted my influence to be positive, so I prayed for the highest outcome and asked Joe, what do you want? Tell the universe and let it go.
Life got scary and very rocky a few days ago, and 2 weeks before our surgery date, We got word that we had to change surgeons. After a series meltdown, and acknowledging my helplessness and expressing my fears about what could happen, I decided to end my fear. I checked the new Doctor out on the internet. As I scanned his site a feeling of release washed over me, and I thanked the universe for its wisdom and guidance, and for giving us this new opportunity.
I told Joe I believe this is where God was always leading us. I felt assured and cared for, and feel the power of love and support. Whatever will be, it is our job to keep showing up, follow the signs and trust our instincts. There is no end, just the next step of this journey.
The energy has been building up to this eleventh hour, forming into ball of light, pushing out into the future. Who knows what we will find when we get there!